humility lessons

I'm fasting. But then again our whole church body is. So what is the big deal when people tell me I'm all hard core because of the fast that God impressed upon my heart. I'm not being strict because I want to be (I miss bread!) but because a fast must cost me something. If its easy its not a true fast, or so I've been taught & believe. Am I being too legalistic about this?

I'm fasting the things that steal my heart and time from Him. And yet I'm find myself filling that time with other things rather than spending time with my Father. Why? What is it in me that is pushing Him away? Why can't I learn to quiet my heart and be laid bare before I God? My hands so readily gravitate toward the novel or DVD on my bedside instead of the Word that is right next to them... My flesh is too strong, it MUST come into submission.

I want to be led by the Spirit, not by my desires (or stomach). Too many of my resources go to these other pursuits when I could be using them to further adoptions, missions, or other things that are Kingdom advancing. But is God really calling me to be an ascetic or is it to realize that every choice is one I need to put before Him - missions or movie? adoption or a novel? a latte or a larger offering?

I see that I am a statistic. I am part of the American Christian culture that professes that God is living in me, yet I act as though I am in control and not Him. I believe in God, but too often I do not depend on Him. This is what I mean when I say "I don't like myself in the States." I've found that when He puts me into another place in the world, depending on Him to provide for my every need, when my very existence is all in Him, my faith grows and my relationship with my Father is so much closer. But why is that true there and not here? Is it really so different? Does my existence here not depend on Him? Is God not the true supplier of all my resources no matter where I am?

It is my desire to have these petitions answered before I leave for Kenya. That I would have resolved in my heart that no matter where I am, that He is all, and that is enough. More than enough. Because if He isnt', what's the point?

deadlines and morning inspirations

Every so often our church has to submit an article for a local paper and seeing that I seem to be the "Christmas Fairy" around here Rich asked me if I'd take care of this month and "make it Christmas themed" he says... This was Friday, the article was due on Monday by noon. I thought about it, and then got busy, and then on Sunday it hit me that it was due and I didn't know what to say... 6am Monday I wake up hit by inspiration and without a pad, pen, or tape recorder to help me remember... Oi! So I got up and hurried through my morning routine and spent the entire commute writing and re-writing the article in my head.

So I get to the office early, start up the computer and get typing... unintentionally delaying small things like staff meetings and such, but I ended up with a decent article, that Rich approved with only one correction (minor typo).

See, the inspiration is this: Why Christmas? What makes Christmas the most wonderful time of the year? Why do these days at the end of the year hold such importance for all of us? Surely it can’t be just because of the material benefit; we have access to that all year. There must be something larger that causes us to look forward to this season all year long. What is that pull that makes us long for Christmas?

Christmas is about Home. There must be a reason we start to sing along with Bing Crosby as he starts crooning out “I’ll be home for Christmas…?” When it first came out it in 1943 it resonated in the hearts of a country in the midst of a war when so many fathers and sons, husbands and fathers were thousands of miles away. They identified with the deep desire to be at home with family. Why? Because the first Christmas was about a family. It was the creation of a Perfect Father who loved His children so much that He chose to identify with them and be part of a family and demonstrate that love in a tangible way. Home is more than a place. It is the knowledge that you are loved and accepted, cherished and wanted. No one can provide that better than the Perfect Father that created humanity just so that He could have relationship with us.

Christmas is because we need Hope. Recently the children’s book “The Polar Express” was made into a movie. The theme of the story is that all you have to do is believe to make Christmas real. How can you believe if you have no hope? The Savior of the world was born to provide that hope in something bigger than us. Because of His birth, we have hope for a life beyond this one. Because of that “Silent Night” hope was born on the earth in touchable form. We are promised, “In his name the nations will put their hope." Even His name Jesus means “Savior.” We are saved from God’s wrath because Jesus and have a hope that we can have relationship with the Lord who loves us.

Christmas exists because of Holy. The magic of Christmas is that The Creator of the World became a human baby. Holiness covered in skin. Majesty enrobed in humanity. The feet that walked on streets of gold were suddenly wrapped in swaddling cloths and laid in a humble Hebrew stable. We can’t forget just how far Jesus came in order to rescue us from sin. That sweet baby boy was God Almighty, holy and perfect. That is the Christmas miracle that “God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16 NIV.

This season draws the soul of each of us because it makes us long for a real home, makes us believe in a real hope, and remember real holiness. May you experience the realities of these three this Christmas.

Crazy... or not?

It's a rare thing... I'm alone in the office - the quiet is a little disconcerting yet thought provoking as well. I follow other peoples blogs, twitters, etc and they make me think. I want to be like that. I want to take a download from God and be able to articulate it in prose so that others can absorb it, apply it to their lives, and then walk out what God tells them.

But I don't seem to be that type. Instead it seems that I end up spilling my guts and agonizing over my failures... being blatantly honest in front of people with all of my junk that too often I would prefer to keep hidden. Why? Is God using me as an example? If so, is it what to do/be or what NOT to do or be?

In preparing to GO next year, I've heard "Wow" "You're so brave" "Aren't you afraid?" and more. Not too different from what people were saying when I was living in Romania. What is it about living out the Great Commission on foreign soil, that make people hold me in such esteem. For me it is easier to live it out THERE versus HERE. Those brave few who truly live it out on our own hallowed ground are the ones that I look at and feel humbled.

They are the ones that get those looks. You know the ones that say "Don't mind them, their just religious crazies" They are the ones who daily put themselves second to God, and say not my reputation God, but for Your glory. They keep eternity and Kingdom in mind, not the perishable. They inspire me to be better. To live for Jesus louder than I do.

Hats of to you my crazy friends - may I be counted in your camp one day.

where to now?

Change is in the air. God is moving, and so am I - in more ways than one.

Some may know this, and some may not, but God has had me in a state of perpetual divine confusion since the summer of 2001. That was when I told Him, that no matter what (including my personal feelings), He came first. And my life has been crazy, wonderful, and full of change ever since. I've lived in 2 states, 10 homes, 3 countries, and 2 continents since then.

And I'm moving AGAIN - to a new part of Connecticut I've never lived in. But in moving there, I'm also preparing to go back overseas. Yep, God has stirred up my "itchy feet" and renewed my passion for seeing His Kingdom expanded to all cultures. I'm going to serve DCF-Africa in an administrative role supporting Ibrahim and Diane Omondi in their roles as the apostolic leaders.

I'm going to KENYA!!

I loved being there for my two week trip this past June/July, but I know I'm in for a lot more than I experienced then. But I felt just as "at home" there as I do here. I'm excited to know that I can serve God with my talents, and still feel like my life is making an impact globally.

DCF Africa is in a state of transformation, and it is a privilege to be a part of it. If you’d like to find out more about what’s going on in Kenya and the East Africa region, you can check out the DCF Africa website, or Springs of Africa, and there's the info on transformation.

As I've said before, let's embrace change - at least it keeps life interesting.

Count Me In

 So, I had to write an article for the Faith Matters section of the Agawam Advertiser.  I had 3 days notice and was given the topic of Spiritual Fathering and Mothering.  I took a brief "reflection" from our church enewsletter and expanded it.  Let me know what you think...

Count Me In

Kerri Craig – Lighthouse Christian Center

 

Parents.  Fathers. Mothers.  What images do these words bring to your mind?  What emotion is stirred up when you meditate on them?  I am privileged to say that I had great parents.  I grew up in a two-parent home knowing I was loved by both of them.  Not perfectly, but with perfect intentions.  I can say I don't struggle overly much with identifying positively with God as a Father because of my father's example. 

 

Yet many do.  Why?  Because the enemy who comes to steal, kill, and destroy has hatched plans against God's greatest symbol of His love: F-A-M-I-L-Y.  Whether by changing the definition of family, portraying fathers as irrelevant and unintelligent, telling moms the lie that daycares are just as good as they are, or that if having a child is an inconvenience it’s perfectly fine to choose to kill it.  The lack of true family is a cancer that is killing our generation, and our nation.

 

Sociologists are now confirming that fathers not only play an indispensable role in the home, but also in the nation.  Many of the problems we face in America today – drugs, welfare, teenage pregnancy – are directly related to the absence of fathers throughout the past several decades.

Fatherlessness is most destructive trend in our generation.  The absence of fathers is linked to most social nightmares.  Social scientists have made similar links between a father’s absence and his child’s likelihood of being a dropout, jobless, a drug addict, a suicide victim, mentally ill and a target of child sexual abuse. – “The Cry for Spiritual Fathers and Mothers” Larry Krieder ©2000

 

Family is one of God’s ways of revealing His nature; the Father’s heart protecting, providing, and helping us go further than we dreamed; balanced by the nurturing, comforting, encouraging, mothering side of God.  Our parents are supposed to be the first ones to introduce us to God.  When parents fail to do this, we lose a generation.  Thankfully, God has placed men and women into our lives to take up those roles as Spiritual fathers and mothers, so that we can go to them to be nurtured, challenged, and mentored. 

 

Do you want to be the change you want to see?  Become a spiritual parent yourself.  Reveal the character of Jesus, and you will draw others.  What is the character of Christ?  Open Genesis to Revelation and you’ll see it woven through all of the sacred scriptures.  He is love, kindness, and patience, not jealous, not boastful, God keeps no record of wrongs, He never fails. 

 

I want this.  I need this.  If this is what family can be, you can count me in. When people are about helping others just to see them do better and not for selfish purposes, count me in. When the church is truly about loving God and loving others, count me in.

 

 

 

here I go again!

I love traveling.  I really like doing things for God's Kingdom.  In June I get to combine them again.  I haven't done anything really "missions" like since I got back from Romania last March.  So I'm really excited about this opportunity to visit the DOVE Kenya churches.  DMI asked me to lead a team in June, and right now it seems like a team of one, I'm still planning full steam ahead!  Who knows what will happen?

I wrote my support letter today and will hopefully send them out soon, but that kind of depends on financial status.  I did though post it on my facebook notes, so perhaps that will produce some interest.  

I wish I knew more html stuff to make this blog more interesting, but I guess I'll work w/ the given layouts 'til I can get more creative or have enough brain cells left over from work to devote to spending time to figuring it out.

Want more info about the Kenya trip? - email me!

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alone

I just don't have anymore patience to give.  I'm running out of grace to extend.  My frustrations with colleagues are starting to infringe on relationships outside of work.  How can I be someone's supervisor as well as their friend?  How can I correct them at work without fear of losing the relationship outside of the office?

I'm in such a quandary.  And why is my life so dominated by my work?  How do I change that?  These are the questions I want to have answered this year.  No resolutions, but sustained life changes ~

 ~ a social life (schedule fun)

 ~ healthier eating habits

 ~ accomplishable goals for the year

Is it possible? I don't know, but I hope so.